Sex After Betrayal:
Reclaiming Your Sexual Self
NEXT INTENSIVE:
Wednesday, June 19 – Sunday, June 23, 2019
Complex Betrayal Trauma includes the overlapping of three specific types of traumatic injury experienced by betrayed partners that occur simultaneously and influence and exacerbate each other.
This four-day therapy intensive focuses on understanding and healing the sexual injury that results from the experience of intimate betrayal.
Despite the growing resources available for betrayed partners, there is very little focus on healing the wound that betrayal creates around a woman’s sense of sexual freedom and self-acceptance.
Many women start with a deficit in this area prior to betrayal. This deficit can be caused by cultural messages of sexual shame and impossible-to-meet sexual standards. Or it can be caused by past experiences of sexual harm, either in childhood or previous adult relationships. It can be caused by confusing religious messages that create ambivalence around sex. Or by the enormous pressure placed on women regarding their body shape and size.
Regardless of where the wound originates, sexual betrayal cuts to the heart of one of the key questions that women wrestle with:
AM I DESIRABLE?
For women, being sexually desirable and being worthy are inextricably linked. We desire to be desired as an affirmation of our deepest need to be found worthy of love, fidelity and loyalty.
This is why sexual betrayal cuts so deep. It makes us question the essence of our worthiness as women.
It is this wound, the injury to your sense of worthiness that is linked to your sexuality, that will be explored, understood, and transformed.
To reclaim your sexual self (maybe for the first time ever) is the healing focus of this intensive.
After completing the Sex After Betrayal: Reclaiming Your Sexual Self intensive you will be able to:
- Operate from self-acceptance knowing that who you are, how you are sexually wired as a female, your preferences, experiences and desires are all normal.
- Help your partner (or future partner) understand who you are sexually and engage in your sexual relationship from a place of self-acceptance and curiosity.
- Identify your Sexual Alarm System, honor your need for safety and move more freely toward the safe adventure of sex.
- Learn how to say no so that you can fully and enthusiastically say yes.
- Find your sexual voice, create sexual boundaries, and gain courage to speak honestly and vulnerably about sexual issues with those who matter.
This Intensive is Ideal For:
- Women who are partners of sex addicts or who have been in recovery from a significant other’s affair and have done initial work to address the crisis of discovery, stabilize trauma symptoms, establish boundaries and patterns of self-care.
- Women who feel ready to deal with the impact of sexual betrayal on their sexuality and are prepared to dive deeply into sexual issues in a safe and confidential small group setting.
- Women who want to better understand who they are sexually and to more fully embrace their sexual selves.
This Intensive is NOT Ideal For:
- Betrayed partners who are in the initial shock and awe of discovery and are still experiencing significant emotional activation and other trauma symptoms. This intensive would be overwhelming and triggering for someone in that stage of healing. If this is you, it may not feel like it today, but you will eventually get to the place where this intensive will be right for you.
- Women who have a history of childhood sexual abuse and are currently dealing with that abuse and experiencing significant emotional disruption as a result. This intensive would be wonderful a little farther down the road when you are out of the intense work around the childhood sexual abuse and ready to take on the work of reclaiming your sexuality for yourself.
How the Intensive Is Structured
The Sex After Betrayal: Reclaiming Your Sexual Self intensive is held at the Center for Relational Recovery’s main office in Leesburg VA just outside of Washington DC. Participants stay at a local hotel.
The intensive is designed as a small group experience with 5-7 participants. The intensive combines individual therapy, group therapy and small group education, exercises and experiences. If you are working with an individual therapist, we will collaborate with them about the work you do with us.
Schedule
Wednesday: 5:30 – 8:30 pm
Thursday: 9 am – 5 pm
Friday: 9 am – 5 pm
Saturday: 9 am – 5 pm
Sunday: 9 am – 1 pm
Facilitators
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Michelle Mays LPC, CSAT-S
Lead Facilitator
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Cheryl Schenck LPC, CSAT
Co-facilitator