Most betrayed partners carry the burden of the same secret fear: that it is some lack in them that has caused their significant other to seek sexual experiences outside of the relationship. The fear goes something like this: If I were thinner, had bigger breasts, was taller, had tighter thighs, were younger, had a prettier face…then he would not be looking at pornography on the Internet. … [Read more...]

Most people know about boundaries and instinctively understand they are important. Betrayed partners are no exception. Often, they feel a keen need to set and maintain boundaries with their cheating partner after discovery. However, what a boundary actually is, how to set a boundary, and how to effectively maintain a boundary can be highly misunderstood or just downright mysterious. For betrayed … [Read more...]

When I was in the initial shock of dealing with Betrayal Trauma, I barely recognized myself. The competent, funny, focused woman I knew was gone, and in her place was a shattered, anxious, broken stranger. This stranger cried all the time, raged like a maniac, was exhausted and depressed, couldn’t concentrate, and felt desperate. I looked in the mirror and thought, “What is happening to me? How … [Read more...]