I recently had the opportunity to be interviewed by Rob Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S on his podcast called Sex, Love and Addiction 101. We talked about working with betrayed partners, explored the reasons why betrayed partners were pathologized early on by the addiction treatment field and defined complex betrayal trauma. To listen go to http://bit.ly/2CksnVZ. … [Read more...]
The Aftermath of Betrayal
Nothing can prepare you for the moment you discover that the person closest to you, the person you count on the most, has betrayed you. If you have experienced betrayal, you need help navigating the emotional devastation that follows. And, even more importantly, you need hope. The Aftermath of Betrayal, is intended to help you identify and articulate the experience you are having. To give you … [Read more...]
Podcast Episode “How To Navigate Through Betrayal Trauma” Featuring Michelle Mays
Every month we bring your way ideas and information on resources, media, or tools to be inspirational, motivating, or helpful in your recovery journey. This month I am recommending another excellent podcast called, “Sexual Addiction: Strength/Hope/Recovery,” by Carol the Coach. Not only is it a great place to get relevant information about recovery, this month our very own Michelle Mays … [Read more...]
September Recommended Reading
New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Know to Make Love Workby Terry Real Terry Real is a masterful couples therapist who has also worked with and written about men suffering from depression. Marriage is different today than it was 50-100 years ago. In the New Rules of Marriage, Real helps couples understand the changing expectations that we have regarding our marriages and how to navigate … [Read more...]
Living As If You Matter
Many years ago, my husband, Rob, and I were living in New York City when he served as associate pastor of a large and active church. I was fully occupied with caring for my new infant and 2-year-old daughter while Rob taught Bible studies, led programs, and engaged in what seemed like endless numbers of meetings with church leadership. I had friendships with some of the women in the church, and I … [Read more...]
CRR Team Spotlight, Aja Murillo
This week we invite you to take a few minutes to get to know a little bit more about Aja Murillo. Aja Murillo is a Supervisee in Social Work at the Center for Relational Recovery. She earned her Masters and Bachelors of Social Work from Hawaii Pacific University.Aja has felt called to work with people her whole life. Early in her career she thought this would be through nursing. Over time, she … [Read more...]
Listen To Your Gut
For many betrayed partners, the adage about hindsight being 20/20 feels very true. They look back after discovering infidelity and see so clearly all the little signs and indications pointing toward their significant other’s betrayal. They remember their feelings of unease, discomfort, fear, anxiety, uncertainty, doubt, and confusion. Then they remember how they chose to ignore what their … [Read more...]
August Recomended Reading
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman PhD and Nan Silver Do you know about the Love Lab? In the 1980s, at the University of Washington, Dr. John Gottman created what became known as the Love Lab to research the way couples interact with each other. In a groundbreaking approach, Gottman and his co-researcher Robert Levenson, asked couples to live and interact in an … [Read more...]
Porn Addiction vs. Fishing
In this Washington Post Magazine article, Dave Barnett tells his story about descending into pornography addiction and finally finding his way out with the help of a friend, a therapist and the willingness to look foolish trying something new. … [Read more...]
Eat, Move, and Sleep for Self-Care
By Robert Rubinow, LPC My experience with many folks in recovery is that they struggle most with taking care of themselves—physically, emotionally, relationally, and mentally. Often lacking sufficient sleep, rest, and recreation, eating poorly on the go (or forgetting to eat!), not exercising their bodies, forgetting to stay hydrated throughout the day, overworking, and feeling guilty for … [Read more...]
Helping Yourself After Betrayal
Betrayal Trauma destabilizes your emotional, physical, and mental functioning, making it very challenging to determine whom to trust. While desperately looking for some solid ground to stand on in the middle of the quicksand your life has become, it can feel impossible to know who to turn to. After all, you thought you were on solid ground before and it turned out to be a sinkhole. Now it … [Read more...]
July Recommended Reading
Surviving Infidelity: Making Decisions, Recovering from the Pain by Rona B. Subotnik and Gloria Harris This book is an oldie but goodie. It has been around for years but has stood the test of time and is still relevant today for those healing from infidelity. The beginning of the book can be particularly helpful for those who are dealing with emotional affairs. The authors devote a section to … [Read more...]
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